A Joker Caller

For the past couple of days, I think I have to say it here, I was, and still am, struggling to find something to write about. And the harder I try, the worse it gets. So I decided to calm down and try my best not to get bitten by the stress bug. So I just let it flow and see what we'll get by the end of this post. No rules. No Grammar Laws. Smiles.

First thing came in my mind was this old man who called about his problematic cellphone. I was in the process of getting into the system finding the cause why he could not use his brand new phone. And because we were encouraged to avoid putting customer on hold for it affects our stat for availability, what I do is I tell customers that I need to work in silence. That if they have questions, they can feel free to ask their questions. 

Now this customer was kind of funny, I think that would be the right word to describe him. He said he had no questions but he had a joke for me. I was like, okay..? So I continued troubleshooting his phone as he continued his joking session with me. So I was half-listening to him. But his joke was, well funny? I think. He said something like this:

There was a very old man who could not pee. This very old man went to see his urologist. The urologist asked him what was the problem. The very old man said, "Doc, I could not pee." Then the doctor asked him, "How old are you?" Then the very old patient answered, "I'm 92." And the doctor said, "Oh I see. Well, you have peed enough!"

Then my joker/caller laughed as if he had told me the funniest joke ever created in the history of mankind. So I forced a laugh there. Well, somehow it was a sincere laugh because I thought that was funny, right? Was that funny? What do you think?

Feel free to leave a comment if you find this joke funny. Well, I don't think I'll get comments from this post but who knows? He-he. Hope to hear from you. :)

Funny Chat

Funny Chat

Now that time is running before the team gets disbanded in September, everyone is always making sure to have fun on the floor.

One time, we were playing on the chat room. When someone left his or her computer unlocked, Ellen, Robyn, Nikka, and Ivan were playing on that person’s chat! Well, it was only on the team chat. And it was really funny!

See the pictures below.

Also I want to share the newspaper versions of the picture during the Class Awards in Convergys where I got this!

Was Forced To Laugh At A Joke

For the past couple of days, I think I have to say it here, I was, and still am, struggling to find something to write about. And the harder I try, the worse it gets. So I decided to calm down and try my best not to get bitten by the stress bug. So I just let it flow and see what we'll get by the end of this post. No rules. No Grammar Laws. Smiles.

First thing came in my mind was this old man who called about his problematic cellphone. I was in the process of getting into the system finding the cause why he could not use his brand new phone. And because we were encouraged to avoid putting customer on hold for it affects our stat for availability, what I do is I tell customers that I need to work in silence. That if they have questions, they can feel free to ask their questions. 

Now this customer was kind of funny, I think that would be the right word to describe him. He said he had no questions but he had a joke for me. I was like, okay..? So I continued troubleshooting his phone as he continued his joking session with me. So I was half-listening to him. But his joke was, well funny? I think. He said something like this:

There was a very old man who could not pee. This very old man went to see his urologist. The urologist asked him what was the problem. The very old man said, "Doc, I could not pee." Then the doctor asked him, "How old are you?" Then the very old patient answered, "I'm 92." And the doctor said, "Oh I see. Well, you have peed enough!"

Then my joker/caller laughed as if he had told me the funniest joke ever created in the history of mankind. So I forced a laugh there. Well, somehow it was a sincere laugh because I thought that was funny, right? Was that funny? What do you think?

Feel free to leave a comment if you find this joke funny. Well, I don't think I'll get comments from this post but who knows? He-he. Hope to hear from you. :)

Things That We Do In Call Centers To Spice Up Our Busy, Or Sometimes Not That Busy, Working Lives!

1. We chat. That's right. Even if we already have a call. Assisting a caller doesn't stop us from chatting next to our seatmate. That is what the mute button is for.

2. We eat. Yes, it is okay to eat on the floor as long as the food doesn't smell. From this habit, you will notice that there are two groups of call center agents. Those who keep gaining weight as the volume of calls increase. And they don't care. Anyway foods, or eating, are very effective reliever of stress. The other group is those who live in the gyms. I don't think there is a need for me to explain that further.

3. We play cards. When I was still with Teletech in Lipa, while taking calls we were playing cards. It was fun. So much fun. Of course, that was when the gods were not on the floor.

4. We draw. We draw whatever we feel like drawing as long as there is a clean sheet of paper and pencil handy from Boss Ivor's drawer. When he reads this, he might stop wondering why his pencils are missing.

5. We call each other using the Avaya, the call center phone. Of course that is not allowed which makes it more exciting.

6. We do coloring. Some of the agents bring coloring books and they color them, of course, with crayons.

7. We drink. That's right. We, or I, bring flavored Vodka on the floor inside my spill-proof mug. That is not allowed which makes it very exciting. The thrill that you might lose your job any moment, that was priceless. If you got caught, from priceless, you become jobless. Err.

8. Talking about other people lives. They, not me, love to talk about who flirts with who, who hates who, who likes who, and all of those who-verb-who's.

9. We flirt. There are so many good-looking people in call centers. So many of us, err, of them. Hey, it is my blog so let us say 'of us', OK? Laughs! So there, you will see him dating her today, then by tomorrow he is dating another her, or a him. Err.

10. We do fashion shows. There are so many call center agents who are so good when it comes to fashion. There are so many beautiful people that to some point, you feel like you are one of them. Really. Some are totally outrageous, like you can't explain what they are trying to express. What era they have come from. Like, oh look, Goku comes alive! How about Piccolo? Err. Name it, we have it.

11. We are one-day millionaire. We earn a lot and spend a lot. That explains it. Many say, I'll start saving money next payday. Two years have passed by, we are still saying that.

12. We do the dirty things. They do the dirty things. I just watch. Laughs!



Obama Will Fix It!

Scenario 1

Agent: Mr. ****, we didn't receive a payment from you on time and as a result, a past due fee was already assessed on your account.

Caller: I don't give a f*** care, Obama will fix it.



Comment: Adik ka, Sir.

Scenario 2

Agent: We only process your payment once we receive it. And we understand that you sent your payment a week earlier before the due date, however Mr. ****, we don't have control over the delivery of your payment.

Caller: And so do I. I don't have control over the delivery of my payment. I'm NOT the President of the United States!



Comment: The caller has a point. A lame one. Adik.

Scenario 3

Agent: OK, let me repeat what I just said. (And she did.)

Caller: What!? Do what now?

Agent: (Sighing after pressing the mute button.) Mr. ****, I was telling you…

Caller: What fees?

Agent: (On mute) Mamatay ka na sanang matanda ka!



Comment: Bad agent. Anyway it was so funny!


Scenario 4

Agent: What city and state, please.

Caller: What?

Agent: What city and state, please.

Caller: What?

Agent: What city…and state…please.

Caller: What?

Agent: (Now irate) What city! City! City!



Comment: What a st**** caller.

And As They Have Said

By Jasmin

1. Jasmin just shared a bit of her secret past. Trish said Jasmin sounded bitter.

“I am bitter but I’ll be better.”

2. Fernand Yim just received a five-minute Aux8 and was a bit upset for a very short break.

“It is better to have something than to have nothing at all.”

3. While waiting for a call.

“Fernand Yim is not handsome. He is awesome!”

By Elve Jane

1. Elve Jane was on mute while servicing a call with a rude customer.

“Get some education, sir.”

2. A caller said that Elve Jane was just reading a script that she did not know what she was saying.

“No, ma’am. It’s coming from the top of my head!”

3. Elve Jane was explaining to the caller why the payment was considered late even if it was made online on the due date.

Elve Jane: Ma’am, you missed the cut-off time online which is 3pm EST. That is why it was considered late.

Caller: How could that be? You’re not telling your customers about the cut-off time so that we’ll be late when we make our payments!

Elve Jane: Ma’am, the posting timeframe is made available online as you make the payment.

Caller: What if I don’t have a computer, how would I know?

Elve Jane: Logic tells us both that you wouldn’t be able to make that payment online if you don’t have a computer.

Caller: (Embarrassed)

By Fernand Yim

1. Fernand Yim was asking Aux8 (The instant break) from Ms. Shee.

“It’s okay you don’t give me an Aux8. But if you insist, who am I to resist?”

2. Jasmin was explaining why she asked too many questions during the Team Meeting to one of the newbies. Jasmin said she was just interacting.

“You did not interact, you did interrupt.”

3. Fernand Yim was being teased by almost everyone in a Team Meeting.

“Can I just walk out?”

4. Everyone asked why Fernand Yim did color his hair.

“It’s allergy. I ate something really bad.”

5. Elve Jane was finding Fernand Yim a little weird, too lively on an ordinary shift.

“I think it’s the hair’s new color.”

6. Fernand Yim was talking to a Chinese caller.

Fernand Yim: When is your date of birth?

Chinese Caller: What?

Fernand Yim: May I know your date of birth?

Chinese Caller: What?

Fernand Yim: Your date of birth? The day you were born?

Chinese Caller: Did you say I’m boring?

Fernand Yim: Err! (On mute Button) (I didn’t know how to talk to him. Err.)

7. Fernand Yim was a bit sleepy while servicing a call. The caller was asking for a breakdown of all the recent charges on her account.

“There was a charge…ano ‘to?”

8. Fernand Yim was asked by the caller if it was okay to put him on hold for a minute.

“Sige, go ahead.”

9. Fernand Yim was having a debate with one of the newbies, Christy, on the floor until he ran out of words.

“Ms. Shee, can you just terminate her?”

Callers for Fernand Yim

1. “If all people in the world are like you, it will be a better world.”

2. “You know what, (between sobs) when my friends ask me what’s in my wallet, I’m going to tell them it’s Capital One.”

By Ms. Shee

1. Ms. Shee received a transferred call from Alex.

Ms. Shee: Hello?

American Caller: Hi!

Ms. Shee: Hi! Sino ‘to?

And…

New CSR: May I have your date of birth?

Caller: What?

New CSR: Please verify your date of birth?

Caller: What? I can’t understand you.

New CSR: May I know when you were born?

Caller: I can’t really understand you.

New CSR: (Pondered for some seconds) Sir, I need to know your date of birth. You know, like…Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday to you… (The new CSR did sing for the customer. Laughs! )